Name Change.... kind of!

Ok, let me start by explaining a lit bit about WHO we are naming this unborn daughter after.

Her name is "Edith". "Edith" means "prosperous in war". The Edith we know is head over heels in love with God. She's one of those gals you'd love to hate, but you can't. She's this tiny thing, in body, but not at all tiny in personality. She can get loud, but doesn't, most of the time. She's covered in beautiful tattoos. I never thought so many tattoos could actually look beautiful, but Edith is like a walking canvas.... art all over her. Edith has dealt with some of the same painful situations I have dealt with. The revealing of that was the beginning of us talking to each other more than a passing "hello", but that's not what bonded us.

You see, while we were in Arizona, someone started a HORRIBLE rumor about our family. This someone was thought to be our friend. This rumor was based COMPLETELY on a "gut feeling". Rather than ask Matthew or myself about it, this person decided to talk to (not proffessionals or even pastors) some of our other friends. People were treating us differently and we had no clue why.... and they were doing it at such a bad time for us. A time that we were searching for answers, for our baby's health. A time that we needed friends more than ever; and our friends weren't our friends at all. It's the kind of thing that makes me look back at our entire time in Arizona and chalk it up as 3 years of fake friends. We had trouble with our first set of friends, as they weren't living what they were preaching and we couldn't be around that anymore. These friends were more genuine. We saw in their own lives how they could love people even as they were being hurt by them. They said horrible things about us..... would ignore us in public. Would not answer Matthew's calls when he was looking for someone to help with Ani and Ki, so that he could drive up to Tucson to visit Alohi in me in the hospital. We know now, they were not friends.

But the one precious Edith, along with her husband, who barely knew us, stood up for us! At times, I'm told, she got loud! When people would start to talk, she'd shut them up right away and tell them they weren't to talk like that around her. I didn't know she knew what was going on, until one evening...... Edith was pregnant. I went over to her house to show her husband some massage techniques he could do to keep her more comfortable. He's so sweet with her. As I was leaving, we ended up having one of those 20 minute post-visit porch conversations about whatever. I was headed to my car when she said, quite out of nowhere, "Alexi, you can't trust your best friend". I knew who she was talking about. That "best" friend had been acting so strange. My husband had approached her husband at one point to ask why they were being so distant, and he said nothing was going on. Edith started to cry. "Lexi, it breaks my heart to see you be so honest and open with people, and you have no idea what's going on behind your back"! She was nearly shouting, and she was shaking. Her husband stood next to her with his hand on her back, trying to keep her calm. I could tell that whatever it was, it was really bad. Edith is an emotional woman, but she keeps calm about her emotions. She couldn't stay calm about this. I was frozen. I didn't know what to say. I knew it was hard for her to tell me those words, and I could tell she was scared I would ask "who" and "what". I didn't want to know! I knew enough to not trust our "friends" anymore. But that was on their part..... the horrible ways they had been treating us. "Edi, I don't want to know. Thank you for telling me." "Alexi, just keep your mouth shut. Don't tell anyone ANYTHING. Don't talk about Lo, or any other part of your life. Just keep your mouth shut." I couldn't imagine what they had said. I didn't care. They were Edith's friends, too, her VERY close friends, and I knew if she was warning me against them, I had better keep my mouth shut!

So we left it at that and I kept my distance. There were times that Matthew and I would talk and speculate over what they could possibly be saying. We came up dry every time.

As we were starting to get things ready to make the move to NC, I was so excited. I had many REAL friends here and I was looking forward to getting far away from AZ. We were getting medical records together to take with us. The huge pile of paper work we got from UMC was insane, but one day, I decided to look through it. And then I read something that upset me so bad, I ran to the bathroom to throw up! "On the day of admittance, an anonymous person called to say they believed Mom and Dad were poisoning the baby". WHAT? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? After that statement came all the test results. They poked her 5 extra times to draw blood for THOSE tests, and they had to put a tube in her bladder to get urine to check that as well. The staff treated us weird on day one. On day two, she had an upper gi test that showed just how bad her reflux was. The staff started being kind to us after that. We found out that Alohi was hospitalized an extra few days while they waited for those test results. The doctors knew why she was so sick, but because someone called with those accusations, she could not go home with us until they could clear us of it. Of course, every test was clear. And the whole time she was there, Matthew couldn't get help from these "friends" to help with our kids. It was so strange.

I called Edith. "Hey, do you know who made that call? I don't want names, but if this is what you were talking about, please let me know, cos that would end the questions in our minds.". She said "no, I don't. That's horrible." And then she had to get off the phone, rather quickly!

About 15 minutes later, she called me back "Lexi, I lied. I do know who called. That's what's been going on and it makes me sick. As soon as I got off the phone with you, I got sick. I can't lie. I really don't want to give you specific names so thank you for not asking. But you know, and that's what they've all been talking about, and that's why they've been treating you so horribly. Lexi, I've stood up for you guys. They've been treating me bad because of it. I just knew it was false. I can't believe anyone would make that phone call based completely on a 'gut feeling'".

When I got off the phone with her, I started packing up for our trip..... right away I did! Matthew was so angry. This whole thing has changed me.... I look for the Edith in all of my friends. If it's not there, I keep my distance. I mean that I look for a strong woman, who stands up for the truth, won't crumble to gossip, and is willing to lose friends in a fight for what is right!

Because the girls in our family all have 5 letter "A" names, Edith was out. So, we though Adith. Something about the name just hasn't felt quite right. I want to call her "Edith", not "Adith". I just know that's her name..... Matthew and I talked about this last night. We figured it out! Her name is Ædith, and that is pronounced the same as our "Edith"..... the one that fought for us! So, our daughter's name is Ædith Catlin Majors. And if you're wondering how to type that, you hold down the ALT button while typing 0198. Not simple, no, but neither is the friendship we have with our precious Edith. And family, you'll get quick at typing that. I know it's crazy, and you might be rolling your eyes, but her name is Ædith, not Adith!