Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Like Joshua

Ever read through Bible stories and wonder;
Why was everyone so afraid when an angel came?
Anytime an angel shows up in the Bible,
they say "and they were afraid"
or something of the sorts.  And angels,
so often, begin their message with "Do not be afraid".

I like to think that if an angel showed up this minute,
I'd be thrilled!  I'd hit my knees and praise God,
and I'd probably be laughing and crying at the same time.
But I don't think I'd be afraid!

Well, I've never had an angel approach.
So I guess it's not fair to say how I'd respond.

I was reading in Joshua and payed close attention to
chapter 5.  Mid chapter, an angel appears to Joshua.
There is no mention of him being afraid.
He falls to his face in worship of the Lord, but the
angel doesn't have to start with "Do not be afraid"
before sharing God's news for him.

I look back on my life and realize I am usually afraid
when I get news from God.
It's usually a sitution so far out of my control,
and so CLEARLY God, and I'm terrified.

Why be scared of something I KNOW is not happening
out of my will?  If it is clearly God's will,
shouldn't I hit my knees and weep and praise?

I look back at about a year ago when Matthew and
I found out we were expecting number four.
I was scared!
I was terrified!
Medically, this was not possible!
We took all precautions..... the kind of precautions
that make it impossible!  I conceived Ædith
at a time that I was not fertile.  And beyond that,
we were taking plenty of precautions!

Matthew had to sit me down a couple days
after we found out about the pregnancy. 
I remember him saying this one thing:
"Why are we so scared when this is so clearly God's will and not our own?"

And after that I took comfort, knowing
this was out of my control, and better that way!
Then she was born!  We realized right away that God
has a will for her.  We begged Him, while she was on that
helicopter, to make the murmur go away, to make her oxygen saturation
go back to normal.  So she'd arrive at Pitt and they'd say she's totally healthy!

We made the long drive to Pitt and we were told about her valve
and about the surgery, and possible surgeries to come.
We cried for a few minutes, and then we prayed.
God, this is YOUR will, so we're not afraid!

I'm there again!
In a situation so out of my control, so scary!
The possible outcome here could effect my life,
and the lives of our whole family forever!
NO CONTROL!
NO OPT OUT!
In this situation, we have seen God work.
TOO many coincidences to chalk up to coincidence!
God's got a plan here....
and now, as the news appears to me, I praise!
Why should I be scared to hear that God is working?

I'm not!

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6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Beautifully put!
Hope everything is okay?

Anonymous said...

Lifting you guys up to the ONE who has control! <3

gluten free girl in a pasta world said...

Thanks for putting things in perspective! I am struggling with the timing of some things right now - but you are correct...HE IS IN CONTROL!

Teri said...

Hope everything is ok! I hate to be nosy but sounds like you are at peace with whatever is going on. Thinking about you!

gluten free girl in a pasta world said...

How are you and yours???

Anonymous said...

I love the fact that you understand the mechanism. Whenever things look hopeless and I feel helpless, I'm left terrified.......Until I remember "do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Phil 4:6.
There is at least 10 sermons in that verse!
Thank you Father for your word and your gifts of mercy. They are new every morning!
Alexi, i invite you to delight in all that He has given us. All we have to do is ask.
The more often I do it, the stronger my faith grows. I thank God for a daughter who loves him so much.
I love you, Alexi
Dad